kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
Thank you to all the wonderful people who whisked me a happy birthday. You guys are awesome ❤️


2014-07-13 21:57
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
So my last post was a... Mess.

A rants, patriotic, weird mess. That just shows why I should not be allowed near the internet when I haven't slept for almost 48 hours, and I've been looking up weird shit.


But I still stand by what I said. It's a mess, but I stand by it.
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
So normally I keep my nationality somewhat quiet outside my dreamwidth/LJ(I've mentioned it other places I'm sure, but I cannot grab a link or anything), and it is because the Danish culture can be a little, ok a LOT, weird.

We have a rally twisted sense of humour(just let Humon show you: This)No really, as a nation our humour is either twisted, dark and/or gritty or we're making fun of everything.... But often in a twisted and dark way.... Or sometimes it's just really stupid, campy and the best thing ever. Danes have pretty much been making fun of everything for a very long time, and it fits with the fact that we're a small(-ish some would argue, but there's what maybe 6 million people living in the ENTIRE COUNTRY! There are US cities with higher body counts than that - and they may just take up about the same amount of landmass) country filled with pessimists and nay-sayers. Yes, we the people that has been called the Happiest People on Earth(WTAELF? *looks around* are you sure you visited the real Denmark? The Scandinavian, European one???), are a bunch of pessimists. But then when we're asked how happy we are, and we look bad and examine our current situation, we realise that things did not go as bad as we expected and we're currently rather happy about that. That's my theory, and almost everybody I've asked about this 'Happiest People' agree with me.

I honestly cannot remember when the Danish style of making fun of everything, and breaking boundaries while doing it, got us into the international spotlight as a people, but I think when the world really caught on to how little is sacred in Denmark was when the controversial Muhammad drawings were first published. I know that they offended a lot of Muslims, and they were really racist while also breaking a holy Sacred Law about drawing Muhammad's face or.... something. No really, that '... Something' is how a lot of Danes felt after the international furore hit us. Caricatures and Parodies are deeply imbedded in Danish culture and heritage, and we poke fun at... Well, everything. From our politicians regularly getting drawn as stupidly, silly caricatures, our mocking of the Queen's New Year Speech(but dis her as a non-Dane, and we will hunt you down and destroy you!), to laughing at something like: (CLIPS ARE IN DANISH!
Or this little pearl

If you think the guy from the first clip looked more than a little familiar to you, you may have enjoy some of his better known international works such as: James Bond - Casino Royal, Hannibal, The Hunt, A Royal Affair and The Three Musketeers. It's the one and only: Mads Mikkelsen (Humon again... Seriously go read her works, she's funny and really original).and the second is a clip from a sort of cabaret show mixed with satire and caricatures called Cirkus Revyen(this particular clip is from the 2012 version) that is one of the oldest running satire/caricature/comedy/cabaret style shows, and there is a new version each year held at our beloved, oldest amusement park called Bakken. Denmark has a bit of a racist reputation around the world, mostly because we elect stupid politicians and do stupid things like make Muhammad drawings, so one could rightly fear that Revyen is just one long racist, patriotic Danish Wank Fest, which is, sadly, very understandable, but more often than not the only people really made fun of in this show is... Well, ourselves. Sure there is sometimes some really, really stupid, racist sketches in thee show, they're often the parts that are forgotten first.

And all this was just so I could make you all understand why I often feel like I should just shut up about being Danish(and to the first one to post a pastry joke about the so called 'danish' - I hunt you down, remove your eyeballs with a dull, wooden, teaspoon spork, and then I will rip you intestines out through your nose and use them to string you up with, naked, covered in honey over a pit of angry fire ants, ok? :D) or sometimes even apologise for the stupid shit we do, and elect to power.

BUT I just found this article about 3 and I was like "YES!"(maybe waking my neighbours up, sorry R&R). This article just makes me want to walk around in red and white, humming 'Sommer, Sommer go Sol'(it was the summer craze song through most of my childhood as I cannot remember a summer without hearing it.) and just be proud of being a Dane, descendants of Vikings.

Read This!

A self styled PUA(Pick-Up 'Artist') came to Denmark, hoping to write a 'riveting' guide to Denmark, but more importantly her women and more specifically virgins. Instead he finds a country whose women for the most part are very secure with who they are, and they do not need some 'Alpha Don Juan' to sweep them of their feet. We are of Viking descend, we can handle ourselves. And while he eventually(on his last night) manages to get laid(with a nervous 18 year old virgin(poor girl)), unlike his other 'literary works' he ends up writing a book about, get this, not getting to bang Danish women, and he ends up calling it 'Don't Bang Denmark'. He calls us a bunch of unfeminine, androgynous robotic women with no femininity, and 'concludes' that the typical fetching Nordic lady doesn’t need a man because we have the government to cover our asses if things go to hell. Or did he ever might consider that he is simply that repulsive to any woman with a functioning brain? Not just to the Nordic women, but to women everywhere? These so called PUA's make me sick. They are a bunch of misogynistic, repulsive, materialistic, unattractive, disgusting wastes of air, and I really believe that the gene pool deserves to be protected from these sleezebags.

Now that the rant is over...

kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
I sorta hate my dad right now. I've been visiting my parents' house for the weekend and last night - oh dear sweet Eru, my dad got me drunk on red wine.

Squirt is away at a weekend scout trip, Brat was tucked in and I was sharing an awesome steak with cream potatoes and tzatziki and an AWESOME red wine. My mum doesn't really drink, and she greatly dislike most red wines, and I had tried a sip of the wine while dad and I was preparing the meal. Normally I only drink white wines, maybe a rosé wine, but the red my dad found yesterday was amazing. I ended up sharing the whole bottle with him, and after that he found half a bottle of a different red. Not as good as the first, but I was at the point where I no longer cared.

Today though... Today I care! I won't say that I'm hungover but my head is full of cotton. It's the first time I have EVER gotten drunk on red wine. My dad thinks it's hilarious, but I will have my revenge!
kira_dark_wing: definition of glomp (Glomp)
I just spent 30 minutes on the phone with my father. 30 freaking minutes!

We didn't even discuss anything important, just 30 minutes of small talk. My mother is usually the one I chit-chat with, while my father and I usually just share a good beer and watch a movie. When I talk with my father, we say a lot of things without really saying anything. I am most definitely a daddy's girl. I love my mum, she is awesome and everything, but my dad is the one I usually go to for comfort. He's a quiet, calm, slightly pacifistic man, and he is my rock. He is the one I go to when everything seems too much, when the world threatens to overwhelm me.

This started out as a 'WTF!?! I just spent 30 minutes chit-chatting with my dad!' and ended up as a Ode to My Father.

I'm such a dork.
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
When other little girls wanted to be princesses, I kinda wanted to be Indianna Jones XD

I totally blame my dad, he raised me on Harrison Ford and Sean Connery films. I can actually trace most of my geekish neediness back to my father, but my mother isn't guiltless. My mum loves British Crime Shows, and since I was a bright little bugger who started reading rather early, I started watching them with her when I was rather young. I have a Christmas Tradition with my parents where we sit down one afternoon, make cinnamon waffles with almonds(my mum's recipe, super yummy.... Great now I'm hungry*pouts*) and we watch the old 'Murder on The Orient Express'. We've done this for as long as I can remember. So I blame my dad for my love for sci-fi and action films, and I blame my mum for my addiction to Crime/Mystery/Thriller shows and films. I blame them, and I thank them.

I will freely admit to hating most newer comedy films, I find them stupid and absolutely pointless, and I hate wasting my time on them. But I still love many different films and shows from many different genres, and I like to think I'm rather well rounded in my cinematic education.

Oh Dear Mahal, I'm such a geek! But you cannot change a tiger's stripes, and I like being a geek.
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
So... I am a huge dork!

I set up my wifi today and when naming my network(s) I've been a humongous geekish dork. The router I have put out two different frequencies, one the average 2,4 gHz connection and the other is a 5,0 gHz connection(brilliant for streaming). I've named them:

DocMammalFish HQ WiFi(and yes I watch 'Penguins of Madagascar' FTW!)
One WiFi to rule them all(And in the name of his awesomess, Tolkien, Amen!!)

And there was worse names on the list.

DeathStar Orbit
TheBlackPearl Captains WiFi
TARDIS mark 40
Trekkie Central
Geekdom Universe
His Noodlely Goodness

..... Somebody stop me!! please?
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)

I finally get my own apartment and today is MOVING DAY!
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
... I never thought I would say this, but I have an old apron that works wonders for my self confidence. It was given to me by my mother a little over a year ago, and it's a very fugly old thing. My mother's aunt sewed it to my mother years ago(when my mother was like 16 or something), it's brown with ugly little orange and white flowers on, and the cut is something straight out of the forties.

I dug it out yesterday to bake, and when I put it on.... I cannot remember the last time my waist looked so tiny! I was seriously shocked when I saw how tiny my waist is. I'm naturally pear shaped, with very generous hips(it makes finding pants that fit an absolute nightmare. If they fit over my hips, they're usually somewhere between 10 to 15 cm too long, and if the length fits they don't fit over my hips*sighs*.), and I'm kind of short(168 cm or 5"5') therefore I have a tendency to look a little chubby. But when I tied that apron it was like a revelation. I suddenly looked so very slim and I gave the illusion of a hourglass figure, my usually large hips balanced out by my tiny waist and my boobs. I have a generous C cup, but I still feel that my hips are way too large compared to them and my waist. But that apron made me feel good about my figure, and I actually felt sexy in that fugly old apron!

Is there a point to all this? Not at all, not besides the fact that sometimes old school/retro fashions can be amazingly good for your self image.
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
I freaking LOVE Kink Memes!!!

I can't seem to stay away from them, and I'm now lurking on*counts* seven different ones. I'm laughing, crying, giggling like a loon, breaking my own heart to itsy-bitsy pieces, and fanning myself like 'holy hell!'

I am most certainly going to a Very Special Hell in my own little Bobsled of Kink™ and I will be smiling all the way X3
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
.... I miss having a cat. I mean I adore my parents' cat, but she's not mine you know? I can't help but looking at the pages of the shelters online, cooing over their cats and kittens. But I can do nothing until I get my own place again, and even then it has to be a place that allows me to keep a cat. Sigh, why haven't I gotten a place of my own yet? Oh Yeah, because I'm on the waiting list to the apartments I can afford while studying.

The weather SUCKS!!! One moment it's so cold Satan's tits would freeze off and the next there's suddenly a warm front over DK, and the rapid changes makes my osteoarthritis act up. So right now I'm doped up on painkillers, bed bound and bored out of my skull.

But on the upside - DAY OF THE DOCTOR!!! The 50th anniversary Doctor Who Special had me gasping, giggling and tearing up, and I love it. One of my favourite scenes is the one with the frozen exploding Dalek and the three, yes THREE, Doctors standing in front. One word: AWESOMESAUCE!!!

I feel I should warn you that I'm going to be doing some very random posts for a while now, just to get back in the habit of keeping up with my online life.m

Hugs and Happy Thanksgiving to those Who celebrate it
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
Do you have some weird guilty pleasure concoction that makes people look at you funny?

I have several - some barely makes any sense to me,let alone the people around me. I'm currently eating a bowl of cottage cheese with raisins mixed in and drinking orange juice with a little lemon juice in it - and J is shaking his head at me, wondering if I've lost my marbles.(I have, but that's another story X3)

so what's your guilty pleasure? come and share - we're all mad here =3
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
It's official - Kira has moved in with her boyfriend and we're happy hell!!! How the f*ck did I get this lucky??

We're happy, and we're not driving each other up the walls or thinking about killing each other! I'm happy as hell and right now I'm euphoric!!
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
You never really notice how much random crap you got laying around until you have to pack it down. I mean this is getting ridiculous - I've packed three boxes and 5 bags... And I'm not done yet! WTELF Kira??? Why do you have so much junk???

This is kinda freaking me out, but I can't wait. J and I get the keys to our apartment the 1st next month and I'm super nevous about moving in together. I'm terrified that we find out we can't stand each other, or that we drive the other one nuts, but I also have these butterflies in my stomach that us pure joy... I guess we have to wait and see
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)

What is it with people misspelling H.C. Andersen's name?? I was mucking about in some book forums and I saw 15, 15 instances of people spelling his name as Hans Christian AnderSON - WTF???? and when I told them that it's AnderSEN they say that they know better than me, even though I'm Danish and currently live in his home city of Odense. Stuff like this piss me off, I know I should just shake my head at their idiocy but I can't help it. H.C. Andersen is an integral part of the Danish culture, and it sorta feels like they're disrespecting my heritage. Normally I'm not all that patriotic, but some things just rub me the wrong way!!
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
WARNING - this post is born from a tired mind after 24 hours of being awake and unable to sleep

So I made a new friend this weekend... only not. I was out with my mates, getting CK drunk because his biological mother passed away from cancer wendsday afternoon, and this girl walks up and starts hitting on my boyfriend. I actually sorta like it when other girls(or guys XD) hits on him(though he only truly seems to mind it when it's the fellas XD) and I get to feel all smug at their looks when he turns them down and then kisses me. But this broad doesn't seem to get the hint, and even when J kissed me she brushed it of as us just being 'super affectionate friends'(that was actually the words she used, the bimbo). So I may have, sorta challenged her to a game of gay chicken... the look on her face when my hands started wandering - WIN!!!! when she hastily backed away from me, and with the guys trying not to laugh, the air-head finally seems to get that I minded her pressing her non existing breasts into J's face and trying to put his hand under her barely there skirt. It may have been slightly cruel what I said to her, but it was so worth it when she stomped of to the guys laughter.

And random though - is it just me or has christmas suddenly snuck up on EVERYBODY? not even my mother-in-law who, has a habit of putting up nisser(a scandinavian thing) everywhere on December 1st, has barely put up anything... But \o/ YAY for snow!!! It seems like we might actually get a white christmas this year in Denmark!!! *twirls* I'm so happy!!! It's so comforting to be putting around in my small apartment in my PJs with my huge ass mug of tea and just watching the pretty outside my window. Even with my Retarded Goldfish Morning Memory Syndrome™ the snow is very calming and pretty - though my room-mate had to stop me from going outside barefooted this morning, because I wanted to, and I'm quoting him 'cause I don't remember, "Go dance with the pretty snow flakes, so pretty, like diamonds," unquote... Retarded Goldfish Morning Memory Syndrome™ strikes again!!!

I swear for like the first hour I really have the memory, and attention span, of a retarded goldfish - it's really sort of embarrassing, the crap I sometimes get up to in the mornings! I once told a friend of mine that I though he looked like a stretched out, discoloured leprechaun <--- WTF me? <(o.0)> what's wrong with you brain?????

Anyhow this is Kira signing off - I will conquer you sleep, I will!!!
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
I recently saw 'Aladdin - the musical' and I was stunned! The two playing Aladin and Jasmin was okay, but the dude playing Geenie was BRILLIANT!!!! I was literally crying with laughter over him - I was worried how they were going to bring Geenie to life on a theatre scene, but this guy was just perfect!! And he only graduated from the Danish Musical Academy last year, but he was amazing! Most of the cast was either recent graduates or students at the academy, with a few exceptions, and it was all so brilliant!!! I wish I could share the whole thing with you guys, but my words doesn't do the show the justice it deserves!!!
kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)
I was just mucking about in some of the old kradamadness posts(and can I just inject how awesome it is too see my auto-correct know kradamadness???) and I just wanted to share my love for that crazy-ass place and the awesome people in it!!! I seriously love you guys and the community - love how there's no such thing as too weird or any 'you can't write that!', and how craziness is in fact encouraged. I mean... I wrote a fic with them as bunnies and people just aww'ed - and I think we're the only place where sentences such as 'needs more werefox' and 'octopuses - YAY!' Actually happen, and the term fancake is taken literally!

So, yeah - I love you guys and I'm so thankful that I know you!


kira_dark_wing: I'm not short. Just unsually not tall (Default)

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